Grass

     I glanced around as the faint scent of the grass, which was still moist from the morning dew, wafted through my nose. It was such a nice morning, as it was the last time I could remember this place with fond and happy memories. The last few times I had been here were unpleasant, and I did not want to remember. But some things are not that easy to forget; they are not like switches, able to turn on and off by one flick of the hand; some things just remain etched in your memory - you cannot get rid of them. Sad to say, unpleasant memories seem to stick in your head, while the happy ones, they just get washed away with time. Happy days seemed so far away and so long ago.

    Perhaps it was not so long ago that I was in this very field, laughing and having the best time of my life. Those days were the best. Perhaps it would not be too long ahead for happy times to come along my way. But that seemed too long for me to wait. How long had I waited for something that would never realize? That would never ever come back to me? I don't know, it seemed all too long.

    There was a time when every single day of my life was filled with joy and happiness, laughter and love. But all that is left now, is just emptiness, despair and misery. Her name was Sara, and she had the nicest smile I had ever seen. Athletic, tanned and pleasant-looking, she was often thronged by the crowds.

    I do not think I can ever say that she and I were real buddies. But we were close, and many secrets we shared. I did not think her as a very important part of my life; I took her for granted; I took things as they came, and naturally the results were disastrous. A follower I was, I would only follow; a leader she was, though she seemed to take things too far sometimes. I was not very happy over that, yet I never did particularly mind it. She was nice and popular, people believed and followed her, why shouldn't I?

    What happened was a blur. Was it that I never showed her enough care and concern? Was it that I seemed too preoccupied with my own life that I never seemed to take any interest in her life and her problems? Had I been too irritating? Was I taking her for granted? I think so, I think it was a little bit of everything.

    We drifted apart. That was inevitable. I thought I did not care enough to hold up my side of our friendship; while she had obviously given up because she had been supporting it for far too long. She did not have the energy anymore. Perhaps she felt it would have been better to give up.

    It took me so long to realize my mistake. It took me so long to realize that I actually did care for her, that I missed her friendship and care, and that friends like that were hard to come by. The good times we had were probably the best times of my life, but they'll never come back. They exist only in my memory, and shall, perhaps, remain that way for the rest of my life.

    I tried to get her back, but the harm was done. We were still friends, of course, after a rough patch. But things were never really quite the same. How could they be after so much things had happened? It was near impossibility. Hopeless as it was, I still tried; I still waited. It never came, things never changed.

    I glanced around again. After all those years, the grass was still the same. Yet my life had changed so drastically. Friendship is just like a blade of grass - fragile. Pluck it away from its roots, and it'll wither. But nurture it, water it and take care of it everyday, it would grow quickly and spread its roots. Before long, you have big patches of grass that would withstand torrents of rain and droughts. I did not take care of the blossoming friendship; it did not withstand the test it was being put through. Now I wished I did.

    Grass - nurture it, water it, take care of it, and grow to love it. It would blossom and perhaps, once in a while, you would see beautiful wild flowers popping out suddenly. Then, you would feel a sense of satisfaction that all your care and effort had not gone to waste. It's a pretty sight; I've seen others grow and blossom, but mine…it's lost forever.

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